Always be yourself and don't be afraid to have an enemy or two

One of the benefits of being a relatively quiet person means I get to spend alot of time just sitting back watching how different people behave. This often includes people changing their behaviour based on the situation they're in or the people they're with. For me, when I see people changing their whole personality and persona simply based on the people they're with, I just think, why? Surely it's easier in the long run simply to be natural and to be the person you are at your core.

Professionally

          Agreed, in certain situations like in a working environment it wouldn't be appropriate to go around swearing and that sort of thing. But saying that, this doesn't mean you have to change your whole personality or the nature of who you are as a person. If anything, I think it would actually be more beneficial in the long run to simply be yourself. This is down to the respect being honest in this way will bring. It will also help employers and colleagues ensure they know what they're getting into when they employ and work with you. This not having to second guess your actions or motives will help you become more effective in the work you carry out and will increase your value to the firm as a result.

          Take my life at uni for example. I never once changed my behaviour or who I was as a person regardless of what situation I was in or people I was with. This was regardless of whether I was with friends or in the company of a Lord or two. I never once changed who I was as a person in any of these situations. Well, except showing off a more formal look in my tie and waistcoat anyway. But saying that, I spend half my time in a suit anyway so anyone that knows me wouldn't consider that much of a difference anyway. I don't know, maybe the nature and style of my personality simply allows me to be myself in these situations without having to change anything. But in my opinion, as long as you are respectful and tolerant of others, then you shouldn't really have any problems.

Enemies

          Being yourself can have its disadvantages though when someone takes a disliking towards you. But there will always be people who don't like you whether you act naturally or not. Therefore you might as well be disliked for who you are rather than someone you're pretending to be. In the words of Churchill;

"You have enemies? Good. That means you've stood up for something, sometime in your life."

          To put it simply, there will always be people who don't like you so don't waste your life trying to please everyone. In the end, that will just make you miserable. Taking that one step further and in the words of Churchill, if you have enemies, that must mean you've stood up for something at least once in your life and that can only be a good thing.

Conclusion

          To conclude, don't pretend to be someone you’re not as there will always be people who don't like you so they might as well not like you for being you. Plus, by being yourself, you will attract people who are similar and have similar interests to you. Not only that, but I find it too tiring and time consuming trying to be liked by everyone and frankly it's not worth the hassle. Professionally speaking, yes you may do things you don't like or be willing to tolerate the odd colleague you don't get on with. However, that doesn't mean you have to change the fundamentals of who you are as a person.

          Secondly, don't be afraid to have an enemy or two. Not only is it fun to annoy them every now and then, but having an enemy and being able to stand up to that enemy does have its advantages. Not only will it boost your confidence, but it will make your life mean something by you standing up for something you believe in. So as long as it doesn't get too out of hand, don't shy away from having an enemy or two, they can have their value and we'll all be better for it.

Thanks for reading,

Jason Cates